Well I met the parents and thoroughly enjoyed the weekend. They were a lot more relaxed than I had expected and I watched closely for mannerisms and habits that are reflected in Landlord (there were many). I have heard much about the parenting style from two somewhat disappointed sons (resentment is too strong a word, but a slight dissatisfaction with how they were brought up) and although I can see what they mean, I think they overall parents do what they can with the physical and emotional resources they have.
Landlord's two brothers and nieces where there, too. Niece1 is 3 years old and extremely timid and doesn't speak often - she is most definitely a child that is seen and not heard - not form a strict upbringing, it is just her nature to be very reserved.
Niece2 is her baby sister - another quiet little thing who will happily sit and gurgle to herself. If you engage with her, she produces the most adorable smile and she seems to have a limitless supply of these. Together, smiling niece and timid niece were just easy to be around.
We tried to find the frog that lives in the pond, played Boules and she showed me her (limited) hula hoop skills - this was as much contact as I had with her, since she found landlord far more fun than me - he was chasing her all around the garden making loud roaring noises, he held her by her wrist and ankles as he swung her around like an aeroplane - but he paid for this popularity with her always wanting to sit on his lap. I'm not used to sharing my man with a younger model, but I can make an exception in this case.
It was very evident that Landlord's father was not used to dealing witha shy little girl and his manner would more suit a band of noisy boys. Many times he would (for fun) make mock-pompous statements and raise his voice and alter his accent for comedic effect. This was meant to be amuse but Niece1's eyes would widen to saucers and her face would show absolute terror - it was up to the rest of us to say "Grandad is silly, isn't he" to reassure her that she wasn't actually in trouble. Shy niece is the kind of child who you would never need to smack - just a mean look would have her quaking in her pink wellington boots so having a booming voice speak out - well I'm surprised she didn't need to go back to nappies for the weekend.
And grandad proved his lack of udnerstanding in child psychology even
further when timid niece was doing extremely well eating someone else's cooking surrounded by grown-ups. Her mother was continuing to encourage her to eat when Grandad announces "well, don't forget there is pudding!" to which the 3yr old instantly lost her appetite for the main course (and who can blame her). And sadly, was left disappointed because the creme brulee/trifle hybrid had a hint of amaretto (from amaretti biscuits) in it and if it tasted boozy to me, I'm sure it would be even more unpalatable to a 3 yr old. (But there was ice cream, so it wasn't a complete disaster).
I an understand how she must have felt. The day before, when the picnic was laid out, my heart sank. Landlord's mother had been primed that I do not eat pork (not even ham, even if sliced very thinly) but found my choices were very limited when the picnic consisted of a variety of pork products and boiled eggs (I loathe eggs more than any food I can think of) and strong cheeses. I don't much like strong cheese either but luckily there was a goat's cheese among them so I had that. Had there been no goats cheese, I would have had to go hungry as there would have been nothing there for me to eat at all.
But the picnic aside, I was surprised at how relaxed his parents were, and how easy the mood was overall. I don't know whether I made a good impression or not but Landlord seems to think so. I like them, too. Very good hosts, generally - made me feel included and welcome and conversation was easy and lots of banter. Definitely went well.